I'm scared cos half of me is down that grave. Hopefully this isn't my last three agonizing weeks. I never wanted to be in lawschool but here I am. I gave up so much to be here. But look where I am. I was never able to bounce back from my great fall. I think I lost the girl who wanted to prove to the world that she could do it. I got tired of having to prove myself to anybody. I go tired of having to compete for the grade, having to deal with routine and boredom, having to kiss ass my professors, etc. I hate that feeling of uncertainty that you can go anytime. It's not bcos you didn't study enough cos you will never be prepared enough. You will always feel inadequate one way or another. I don't want to regret that I wasted 2 years of my life. In a few months, tough decisions have to be made. Can I still change my mind? Can I lose my sense of self? Am I entitled not to know what the heck am I doing with my life? Is this my open ticket to see the world? I so need more that a yosi break.
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Finished or not finished, please pass your papers.
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