HAAAY *

I hate having to explain for other people. My mom never fails to ask such annoying questions. This morning she asked something like this, "Bakit yung mga kaibigan mo hindi nagpapakasal?". [At 22, I have to ask permission from my mother where I am going since Im going to visit my friend from the hospital "today".] I go, "Sino-sino?". I was thinking who among my friends got pregnant and never married. I could only think of 2 or 3. That wasn't too many, ha! She sounds too worried kasi. She said, "Pati ung sa inaanak mo". To defend myself and my friends from further scrutiny of my mom, I simply said "Hindi na uso yun". PERIOD. That was the end of the conversation. It was no use trying to argue with her because she's stuck at one perspective/POV in time. I can't blame her but the truth is the world is changing now. She has to face it and that I cannot always explain to her bit-by-bit how it all happened.

During my mom's time, people forced couples to "seal the deal" after the woman gets pregnant. COME ON! These people rob them of their choice if they really want to get married. You know, people want to have sex and that's fine but why punish them?! Why condemn those who do not wish to marry? It will be a nightmare for that kid to find out that the primary reason why his parents got married was because of him. I admire those parents who do not force their children to marry the man after carrying his baby. I am not promoting single parenthood or anything, but I just want people to decide when they're ready or when they're willing. Marriage is no joke. No one in his/her right mind should get married bcos other people want him/her to. (Exception: Fixed marriages, Shotgun weddings, etc.) I would like to see families that are "complete" in the sense that the father and mother are married with children. That doesn't work these days. Usually, the man ends up with another woman, the woman hopefully ends up with another man. Most of the time these people become happy in the end, so what's wrong with that set-up?

What is unique to my generation is freedom of choice. These days we are given more freedom to decide for most part of our life. The past generation wants to put a leash on us so that we do not stray from "the norm". But HEY, being single with a kid is okay. the father of the child in a different relationship is okay. not marrying when pregnant is okay. What sucks? Marrying primarily bcos of the child. Endless brouhaha bcos of the marriage... bcos of the child. The couple not given the choice to decide. And so on.

Given this freedon of choice, stand for what you've chosen. Do not blame others for your decisions once you made it. Yes, if you guys want to have sex, go on but stay protected not only because of unwanted pregnancy but bcos of STDs too. If you must bear a child and then decide a way out, it's your choice. Stand by it. Listen to what your head and/or heart tells you. Listen to those people whom you trust when making decisions.